Re: new year

Dear Momma,
Happy New Year!
I'm glad you've been able to go to the temple. I know it's rough. I was allowed to go the same day I found out about Casey. I felt the same way you did when I went through - like lead. It seemed like just raising a hand or saying a word was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do. And I bawled too. It's okay. I think the temple workers understand - people go there with their biggest problems all the time. It's hard and humbling sometimes, but I do believe that the temple is the best place to just lay our heartaches and our worries at the Lord's feet. Keep going. Going to the temple is your time to hand your broken heart over to the Lord and let him heal it. You'll be surprised at what the Lord can do with a broken heart. He tells us over and over again in the scriptures to offer Him our broken hearts. There's a good reason for that.
Yes, I did get the pictures from Dad and Aunt Rhonda. They're great. Dad has some good pictures of Casey. Do you have them? Here are some extra copies of my pictures too.
As for Ian's mission call - either call Uncle Dale and Aunt Bonnie yourself, or have MomMom do it. Tell them from me that God is sending Ian exactly where He wants him to go. There is nothing in Mexico or anywhere else that's bigger, tougher, or stronger than God, and He loves His missionaries, so Ian's going to be just fine. Ian's going to love it. Tell them to repent and stop standing in the way of the Lord's work before they get rolled over by it.
I think the Christmas tree has been put to great use. Whose ideas were these things? What do you have in mind for the ornaments you're going to make from it? I'm getting a few, right?
I did tell PawPaw to just hold on to the money until I come home. It'll be safer then than carrying it around in my wallet for a year. Thank Woodrow, Dusty, and DadDad for helping with the money too. I really appreciate that.
I keep thinking about Dusty a lot. I told my companion about how special Casey is to Dusty. Dusty got to help deliver him. Dusty got to name him. Dusty baptized him. She pointed out to me that that kind of big brother relationship is probably very similar to the way Christ has always been to us. He was the firstborn of the Father. He was there to see each of us come into being, and watched and led and taught while we learned there before coming here. I think she's right. I know you worry about Dusty, and pray for him to come back to church. I do too. Why not invite him to come to church with you the next time he's in town? Maybe an invitation is all he needs. He might not realize that he's missed.
I think LaJusta's mom must be a very smart woman. We do need the support of our loved ones to move forward, regardless of which side of the veil we or they happen to be on. Some days it's seemed to me like I've had to really exercise my faith NOT to just think about Casey all the time. Of course we can't forget him. Never. But moving forward doesn't mean moving away from him. Casey isn't stuck in the past. He's still close by. And he's part of our future. Moving forward means moving closer to him, and to our Heavenly Father. It takes faith to start smiling and laughing again. We show the Lord our faith in His plan and in His power to heal by enjoying our lives - allowing Him and other things to bring us joy again.
Smile. Laugh. Have the faith to love this life.
I love you.
Syster Hillary Kiser