Re: so much love

Dear Momma,
I know exactly what you mean about being angry. I don't care about vengeance or punishment. Those things are up to God, and if we take them into our own hands, then justice is served and God does no more. But I want that manipulative little Vanscoy girl to understand what her stupid lie has done. I doubt she knows that her lie is what caused Casey's death. She should be told. She should see his letter and the police photos so she can really see the consequences of her actions.
I am glad I got to talk with you and everyone else so much. Talking on the phone has been the best part of this week by far. It's when I've felt the calmest. Getting out of our apartment and being around other people helps too. I have less time to think that way. My poor companion's trying her best to keep up the good work and have some semblance of normalcy while my moods are just swinging all over the place. I can tell she has no idea what to do with me. I don't either, really.
I've been researching conference talks on death and the atonement. And I've got a few other things that have helped me too. I'm sending copies of it all to you. Share with Dad. It's a lot of paper, so I'm only sending it once. The talks can all be found on the church website, and I'd love to have them posted on my blog.
I think it would be great if everyone in the family could write down as many memories of Casey as we can think of. It would be wonderful to put them in a book. I'm writing mine down, and I'll send them.
We're all going to make it through this together. It seems impossible, but the Lord does have the power to heal even this. Casey's given us a beautiful gift - the chance to all come closer together and to the Lord, maybe in a way that nothing else ever could.
I love you so much, Momma. Please pass on my love to the rest of the family too.

Love,
Syster Hillary Kiser